Accounting is the language of the business. It is the process of recording financial transactions pertaining to a business. Get here the list of some accounting pick up lines.
1 to 25 Accounting Pick Up Lines
1. Guy: No its a highlighter…..I use Becker wanna get naked?
2. Guy : Hey girl! What say we go back to your place and I Audit your Assets?
3. Girl: Is that a highlighter in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
4. Girl, are you a tax accountant? Cus you make file for an extension
5. Girl you should’ve listed me as a deduction, cuz I am dependent on your love.
6. Girl you meet all my criteria, so you better believe I am going to capitalize.
7. Don’t you try to claim an exemption, I saw you staring at me across the room.
8. Do you have any obligations for tonight? BC I’d love to take you home and we can retire those assets.
9. Can I put my substance all over your form?
10. Can I be your external control?
11. Boy: Because I’m so loss without you!
12. Boy: Are you my revenue?
Read: Finance Pick Up Lines
13. Baby, your not just another journal entry, you balance my books.
14. Baby, I wanna liquidate your assets.
15. Baby if I take you home? It’s an experience you ain’t gonna be writing off anytime soon.
16. Baby how bout we leave this McDonald’s and get started on that additional child tax credit?
17. Baby girl, I saw you talking to that guy over there. Don’t. There’s a going concern that he has significant control deficiencies.
18. Are your assets temporarily or permanently restricted? BC I’d spare no expense to unrestrict them
19. Are you 1040EZ? Cause need to fill you in
20. After I’m done with your assets you’ll have to test for impairment
21. I think we should swap some liquid assets.
22. I should recognize you as a capital lease because I will own you at the end of the day.
23. I like to delay my score release so you can enjoy some tension.
24. I know I’m not a 99 or even an 85. I’m a 75, will you take me for who I am?
25. I have incredibly liquid assets right now, and they’re dying to get a good return.
26 to 50 Accounting Pick Up Lines
26. I don’t care if you’re rich or poor because I will make your cash flow.
27. I can’t prove feasibility in this relationship. I have to write you off.
28. I can show you exactly how to earn your income tax credit.
29. How ’bout we do it double entry
30. Hey, how bout you increase your charitable contributions by handing me your digits?
31. Hey girl, if I was an accountant, then you just accrued my love.
32. Hey girl, do you want to make a double entry in my ledger account if you know what I mean.
33. Hey beautiful, did you know that sex toys are deductible this year?
34. Hey babe, what do ya say we go back to my cubicle and fondle each other’s PBCs.
35. Guy: Your feet tired? Because you’ve been running in a straight line in my mind all day along.
36. Guy: “Thats right Girl… Benefits while maintaining Independence
37. Girl: I’m a MACRS 150 kind of girl, sorry.
38. Girl : “But you barely even know me”
39. After filing today, I learned I have quite a strong flexible spending account. Are you flexible?
40. So, how do you feel about things in arrears?
41. So do you file electronically around here often?
42. Sir : Hey madam, your assets are materially overstated.
43. Rest assured, I have a large enough staff for adequate coverage.
44. Please baby, let me withhold you.
45. Normally I am strictly IFRS but for you I’d switch to GAAP because you are extraordinary
46. Nice assets.
47. Nice ‘boot’.
48. My Trial Balance just won’t balance without you
49. My goodwill may be intangible, but my fixed assets are rock solid.
50. Madam: So said who? The man with the very small bank account balance?
51 to 77 Accounting Pick Up Lines
51. Listen, I’ve been auditing your body all night, and it is in damn fine standing.
52. Listen, I’d love to sleep with you, but it’s tax day and I feel like I’ve already been screwed by an entire government agency.
53. Listen I don’t know what the hell an S corporation is, but I know I want to buy you a drink.
54. Listen honey, being with me is so good it’s taxable.
55. Lets try and make this triple bottom line.
56. Let’s fill out a 1040 — you’re a 10, and I’m 40.
57. Let me tell you somethin: if you’re filing with me? You’re definitely filing a…’10-40.’
58. Lady, you make my pants file for an extension.
59. Is _____ (name of whatever she’s drinking) the material weakness in your internal control?
60. IRS = I’m really sexy
61. In my office, “I.R.S.” stands for ‘I’m really sexy.’
62. If I help you screw Uncle Sam, can I be next?
63. If I had you, I wouldn’t need to use my Handbook.
64. If I had you, I wouldn’t need to perform so many manual entries
65. If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I near ENron so we could take it down together.
66. I’ve got an option I’d like to exercise on those plan assets.
67. I’ve been in public practice for several years, and that’s easily the largest endowment I’ve ever seen.
68. I’m not ready for this projected benefit obligation.
69. I’m gonna have to make some adjustments to your bottom line
70. I’m done being a sole proprietor, let’s form a partnership
71. I’ll show you my corpus if you show me yours!
72. I’ll show you my “bits” if you promise not to “byte”.
73. I’ll let you audit my assets if you let me audit yours. You’ll be pleasantly surprised to see what’s in my books.
74. I’ll have to credit you for my asset depletion
75. I’d love to amortize your discount on bonds payable.
76. I’d do just about anything to see your GAAP.
77. You must be a one-sided balance sheet, all assets and no liabilities.
78 to 104 Accounting Pick Up Lines
78. You make my pants file for an extension.
79. You don’t need a bridge loan to close the GAAP between us.
80. You can come over a work in process but I’ll make sure you leave a finished good.
81. What do you say we spend the rest of our useful lives together?
82. What do you say we go back to my place for some agreed upon procedures?
83. Wanna sneak out behind the ‘hedge’ and play with my financial instrument?
84. Trust me, I’m an accountant, I know how to manipulate firm assets
85. This was just a sale-leaseback.
86. This inquiry has been nice, but I’d like to do a walk through of your operations.
87. The moment I found you, my depreciation method changed from a double-declining to a 150% declining balance
88. Technically, having sex with me is a charitable gift.
89. Take me home tonight, and I guarantee you’ll see an extraordinary item.
90. Let me tell you something: if you’re filing with me? You’re definitely filing a…’10-40.’
91. If you were an income item, you’d be an extraordinary gain.
92. I’m done being a sole proprietor, let’s form a partnership!
93. I’d do just about anything to see your GAAP.
94. I think I could add some serious value to your account.
95. I know I shouldn’t use the direct write-off method, but I’ll do it for you.
96. I have a small winky, but a big bank account.
97. Hey girl, do you know why they call me Gross Profit? Well actually, no one does…they just call me gross.
98. Hey babe, what do ya say we go back to my cubicle and fondle each other’s PBCs?
99. Girl you don’t need no bridge loan to close the GAAP between us.
100. Can you be my accountant, because it’s too taxing for me not to love you.
101. Baby you’re so unique, I have to job cost instead of process cost.
102. Babe, you SUTA my needs.
103. Are you a corporate bond? Cause I’m accruing interest in you!.
104. After filing my taxes today, I’ve learned that my spending account is quite flexible. Are you flexible?
